Mirthful Monday

Alright, folks.  Not only is a Monday here but it was extremely windy last night (read: no sleep!), two kids have colds, we just finished Spring Break, and the weather is THIRTY degrees lower today than it was yesterday. I am exhausted and the clouds and lack of sunshine (while I am deeply grateful for the rain they will hopefully bring) are lulling me back to sleep.  I need some mirth. Fast.

So here's a picture of my kids and I at one of the natural springs in Manitou Springs, CO (where we went for Spring Break). People used to come to Manitou for the water and all of its "health" benefits. That stuff was pretty nasty, but I managed to convince my kids to try some. It was like an early April Fool's!

Or, if the thought of that tinny, salty water with the healing properties of snake oil won't do it for ya. . . just remember:

(Dear Person Who Thought to Stick This in the Cave of the Winds Gift Shop: you made my day. Seriously. Like a hundred times over. This was awesome!)

p.s. If any of you dear Readers ever go to Manitou Springs, be sure to eat at The Heart of Jerusalem restaurant. SO yummy!


Happy Monday everyone!

New Year's Resolutions (What I'm NOT going to do.)

I'm not a big fan of resolutions. Maybe it's because I'm already really good at stressing myself out, but giving myself one more list of things to do (and they are usually really BIG things) just seems like a prescription for nuttiness--and we all know I have plenty of that already!

Also, I may be a lot like Calvin. I think most of us are. After all, it's always easier to talk about how other people need to change than to change ourselves.

But change is actually something I'm a big fan of. Well, let me restate that: self-induced and self-aware change is very thrilling to me. Change that comes from the outside is usually pretty frightening and makes me at the very least catty and at the very worst non-functioning. So, in the spirit of embracing self-aware change in my life (because maybe if I embrace self-aware change I can keep the bad change away??), I am making a single resolution: stop volunteering for stuff.

If you know me in my personal life, you know that I spend a lot of time starting projects and not always finishing them because I end up volunteering to do some other project for someone else. For instance, I have the beginnings of 5 novels written (and some of those novels are almost completely outlined) but I have no finished manuscript. This blog is another good example. I still have it up as a resource and because I intend to post on a number of topics but, well, I don't because I'm spending time planning my Primary lessons, or getting ready for the book club at my kids' elementary school (that I'm helping with), or putting together stuff for the Odyssey of the Mind program I'm running, or running my kids between soccer practices and piano lessons and doctor/orthodontist appointments, and who knows what else!

Now, I firmly believe this is a phase of life thing and that spending time with my kids doing enriching and challenging activities is a great thing but that doesn't stop me from being jealous when someone else finishes a project that doesn't involve their children. Hence my resolution: stop volunteering for stuff!! All those things that keep me crazy-busy and up till all hours of the night are things I volunteered to do. I can make better choices.

My resolution last year was to finish up some unfinished projects. I almost completed one (catching up my kids journals). I made some headway on another (family scrapbook). I started shopping a manuscript for a children's book (it's gotten one rejection, one "ask again later", and one I haven't heard back on yet). And I started exercising again and got rid of my back pain. Also, none of my children died or went hungry or naked and my marriage is intact. See? It was a GREAT year!

I'm hoping my resolution this year to STOP VOLUNTEERING FOR STUFF, LAURA!! (I'm putting it in caps as a way of yelling at myself, not as you, my lovely readers!) will aid me in accomplishing last year's goal of actually finishing what I start.

Wish me luck! How about you? Got any good what-not-to-do resolutions??

Mirthful Monday: Antidepressants are no laughing matter?

Since I'm now antidepressant free (it's been three and a half weeks since my last pill and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about that) I thought I'd look up some good antidepressant jokes for you. Turns out there aren't any. Apparently most people who take them don't like to joke about it. Weird!

So, in what may be a truly misguided effort, I'm going to attempt to modify one very unfunny joke in order to make it funny.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Norma Lee.

Norma Lee who?

I really don't know.

It's still not funny, is it?

Well, at least I found a funny pic:



For one woman's take on why you just can't laugh at antidepressants click here.

OR, if you need something truly funny to perk up your Monday, there's always Charlie Bit My Finger (Little kids with British accents! That's ALWAYS funny!) or David After the Dentist (Nothing like a kid on happy gas and Novocaine!). Those are always good for a laugh :)

Happy Monday!

Mirthful Monday: Inspirational Translations

I thought I'd better put up a Mirthful Monday after last Friday's depressing (can't say I didn't warn you!) short story. So here's some inspirational translations to get your week started off right.

For those of you who need to be reminded to take risks:



For those of you who need to be reminded to dream big:



And for those of you who need to be reminded to be courteous:



Happy Monday!

Mirthful Monday--music video style

Reminiscence from my childhood: My parents blocked MTV and VH1 from our house. In uber-Mormon land (and in over-achieving parent land, I might add), all TV is bad--cable channels are the worst. My brother (Hi TJ!), being a budding techno-genius, figured out how to work it so we got those channels through the VCR. He and my sister watched grainy, bootleg videos every afternoon all the while exulting in the fact that they were doing something sneaky. I was the youngest and, ahem, a nark, so I told on them--a fact which no one in my family has EVER let go of. My parents called the cable company and they sent a guy who snipped the literal-under-the-ground cable and the sinful, albeit sometimes soulful, channels were gone. So we all started sneaky around so we could watch Comedy Central.

The point: I don't get music videos. Now that I'm an old, over-sensitive mommy I can't figure out why anyone, anywhere would want to watch music videos. They are dirty. They are random. And they inspire weirdo rappers/singer dudes to interrupt lovely young country starlets who are getting awards they may or may not deserve (which is entirely beside the point, Kanye!).

Anyway, I finally found a video I get. Sort of. Well, okay, I don't get it. But at least it's funny!! Happy Monday!

Mirthful Monday: Where NOT to get your political views

There's been an awful lot of political chatter these days and it's making me nuts. Not because I agree or disagree, but because so much of it is the product of ridiculous, knee-jerk, reactionary thinking. To set the record straight: I won't judge you based on what you think about health care and insurance, President Obama's speech to school kids, or even if you think Obama is an antichrist. All I care about is whether or not you are well informed. So today I'm going to suggest a few places to NOT get your political eduction.

#1 Bumper Stickers




#2 T-shirts



#3 Taco joints in Pocatello, Idaho (really!)


So if we can't rely on pithy, inflammatory statements and graphics what are we to do? Maybe we should all start trying this:



Happy Monday!

Mirthful Monday: What happens when you google "funny"?

You get a lot of stupid cat pictures. And this:



Admit it: you laughed out loud, even if was just a little snicker. And, as a bonus, you'll have that song stuck in your head all day!

Happy Monday :)

Mirthful Monday: The most awesome greeting card ever!

The inside says, "Have a nice day."

Published by Palm Press

MIrthful Monday: I thought you might be able to use this one in FHE

A Sunday School teacher was teaching the importance of love in the home. She illustrated her point by referring to the commandment, "Honor thy father and thy mother." She then asked if there was a commandment which taught how to treat sisters and brothers. One little boy from a large family raised his hand quickly. Innocently he asked, "Thou shalt not kill?"

Mirthful Monday: The Twelve Warning Signs of Good Health

THE 12 WARNING SIGNS OF GOOD HEALTH*
(If several or more appear, you may rarely need to visit a doctor.)

1. Regular flare-ups of a supportive network of friends and family.
2. Chronic positive expectations.
3. Repeated episodes of gratitude and generosity.
4. Increased appetite for physical activity.
5. Marked tendency to identify and express feelings.
6. Compulsion to contribute to society.
7. Lingering sensitivity to the feelings of others.
8. Habitual behavior related to seeking new challenges.
9. Craving for peak experiences.
10. Tendency to adapt to changing conditions.
11. Feelings of spiritual involvement.
12. Persistent sense of humor.

Mirthful Monday: What the difference between a psychologist and a magician?

While a magician pulls rabbits out of hats, a psychologist pulls habits out of rats!

Mirthful Monday: What Day Is It Today?

Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I?ll bet you don't know what day this is."

"Of course I do," he answered as if he was offended, and left for the office.

At 10:00 a.m., the doorbell rang and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a box of a dozen long stemmed red roses. At 1:00 p.m., a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates was delivered. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress.

The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.

"First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed.

"I've never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!


That groundhog is definitely gonna see his shadow!

Mirthful Monday: Two one-liners and a light bulb joke

"I'm only paranoid because everyone is out to get me."

***

Psychiatrist to his nurse: "Just say we're very busy. Don't keep saying 'It's a madhouse.'


***

How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?

-Just one, but the light has to really want to change.
-Just one. And his mother.
-Just one, but it takes nine visits.
-None. The light bulb will change itself when it's ready.
-"How many do you think it takes?"
-"How long have you been having this fantasy?"

Support Where You Need it the Most! (part one)

No, I'm not talking about that kind of support (although you all do know how much I love my veggies!). I'm talking about an emotional support system--how to build one and how to use it.

Building a Support System
I think we all know what a support system is and, if you all are anything like me, we fantasize about that perfect spouse/friend/parent/home or visiting teacher who intuits our needs so well that we hardly have to do anything. But building a support system isn't something that is easily done. It takes time and effort. The big thing I've learned a long the way: *Honesty* In order to build a support system you need to be honest with yourself and with those close to you about how your mood disorder affects you. Both of these things can be difficult.

Being honest with yourself is hard because you likely over-estimate your faults and your worthiness. You likely believe you should do things on your own and that because of the way you struggle you don't deserve the love and attention of others. You may even believe it is more righteous to struggle on your own. This is not true. Even in the throes of the bad days, especially in the throes of the bad days, you deserve to have someone there to help. There's a reason God organized us in families and wards/branches. We are meant to help each other out. How else are we supposed to fulfill our baptismal covenants? (See Mosiah 18:8-10)

Being honest with others is hard for a couple reasons. First, you don't know how they'll react (my favorite: "When I get down I know that's just Satan inside me and if I repent he'll go away." Great. So now I'm depressed and possessed. That's super.). And second, you may lack the words to describe what you are going through. The only way to figure these two things out is through trial and error (or as I like to say, trial and effort). Therapists are a really good place to start with this. They've heard it all so no matter what you say you can't weird them out--or if you do you can always find another one! They are also good at aiding introspection. They just seem to know how to help you hear yourself better and the better you understand yourself the easier it will be for you to explain all that to others.

Not everybody you know is going to be the right fit for you. This website has some nice tips to help you figure out who to start reaching out to (disclaimer: I'm not so sure about their tip to include stuffed animals in your support system. I mean, for me, personally, it's hard to talk to a teddy bear when I know my preschooler is doing the same thing in the next room).

Another great idea to aid you in building your support system is one I got from Coffinberry. She got this table from her brother and I think it encourages some good thinking and communicating. It is called "Mad Maps". In a Mad Map, you make a list as such:

*In Every-day Times
Things you should do:
(For example)
Bring me herbal tea
Tell me how great I am

Things you should not do:
(For example)
Give me Caffeine
Make me stay up late

*In Times of Crisis
Things you should do:
(For example)
Help me find a quiet place
Sit with me and listen

Things you should not do
(For example)
Tell other people what's going on


Coffinberry said, "This list would be available for those who wish to support you in times of sadness or crisis. This seems to me like a great tool for care-teams. It helps people to know how to support you, but it also helps you explore how yourself and what kind of support you need. It also gets you in the mindset of building a support network for yourself."

So whether you start with a therapist or with a Mad Map, take a good look at the people around you and see who you can depend on because as a good friend once told me, "We're all waiting to love you. Just give us the chance!"

What's funnier than depression? Therapeutic Humor!

Common sense (and Reader's Digest) has long held that laughter is the best medicine. But what common sense couldn't have guessed was what that sentiment would spawn.

Have you all ever heard of World Laughter Day? Or how about Laughing Yoga? There's even an Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor. (A treatment needs its own association before it's a "real" option, right?) Oh, and according to the ever-venerable WebMD, laughing 100 times equals ten minutes of cardio.

But seriously people, this is more than Patch Adams. This is serious science with serious health benefits. Besides the usual stuff like laughter helps ease mood disorders(did all you depressed people catch that!) and lightens up emotional situations, laughter can help ward off heart attacks, boost your immune system, and help you lose weight! (Okay, that last one is pretty old science, but I like the idea so I put it up. Hmmm, Charlotte do I hear an experiment coming?)

Anyway, you've probably heard a lot of that before but I think it is worth reminding you of. Oh, and in case you haven't gotten your laugh on today, here's the funniest dancing video. It starts out slow but the end is a real whammy :)

Sometimes we all need a reality check

So, here's the funniest one I've come across in a long time! Enjoy! (Oh, and I'll send you a quarter if you can tell me which actor was formerly on So You Think You Can Dance. Okay, not really, but maybe if you look under your couch or in your car or something you can find yourself a quarter and buy a gumball. That'll make you happy ;)

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

p.s. Sorry for the dumb "scanscout" popup. You just have to keep closing it.

Just For Fun!

I literally have five minutes until I have to pick up my kindergartener, but I got tagged by another blogger so here it is:

My Seven Random Facts (because that's what they asked for)

1. I have three sizeable zits right now. I really shouldn't talk about them, but they're grossing me out so I can't help it.
2. If I was going to be on a reality TV show it would be American Idol. I'd get my butt whooped but it would be fun to perform again.
3. The most recent book I read was Kindred Spirits by Chris Bigelow. It was weird.
4. I have watched three full episodes of the new 90210. There's no explaining why; I don't like the show. Maybe I just like to gawk at the main characters extremely thin legs. Really, how can she walk on those things? I looked for a picture online but I couldn't find any. So just imagine two lotion-y fake tanned toothpicks with knobby knees and you'll be set.
5. Hmmm. . . I'll have to come back to this one later.
6. I made a chocolate banana cream pie for the first time on Saturday. Hubby requested one and I was in the mood for an adventure. It was SO GOOD.
7. The most awesome anti-tobacco ads I've ever seen were at a gas station in Wyoming. You should use them in your FHE tonight!




Oh, and, you know, I'm supposed to pass this tag thing on, but I've never been a big fan of chain letters--so if you want to be, consider yourself tagged!

Too funny!

95 As a 1930s wife, I am Very Superior Take the test!

I got this off Elizabeth-W's blog and it made me laugh out loud! My high score must be due to being LDS: I have a lot of kids (well, only 3--but it feels like a lot!), attend religious services regularly, and am part of a women's organization. Also I don't cuss or have a dope addiction (sure glad the quiz covered that!). I think I did get docked though for crying too much. . .the quiz must be prejudiced against depressed people ;) Anway, I always thought I was an anachronism and now it's been confirmed!

We'll look back on this and laugh?

Being only 26 years old and the mom of three little ones, I get a lot of bizarre comments from people. Things like, "They're not all yours are they?" and "That's too bad" are ones I've heard. A month ago I was waiting in line for a prescription, since at least one of my children is ALWAYS sick, and the man in front of me commented on how I had "so many" kids. He then said, "Yeah, I don't have any. It just seemed too hard and really they'd just get in my way." In my mind I was thinking, "Wow. So that makes you selfish and a coward! Good for you!" Part of me still wishes I'd said it out loud. Of course, the one that takes the cake came from Santa Claus at the mall last Christmas. I walked up with my kids--so that they could stare at him, because of course none of them would actually sit on his lap or talk to him despite the fact that they begged to see him-- and Santa said to me, "Are they all yours?!" To which I replied, "Yep! I sure am lucky!" To which he muttered, "Well, I guess it's your choice. . ." Right joy old elf, indeed.

Anyway, the comment I get most often is one that is familiar to parents the world over. It usually comes from a little old lady or a well meaning checker at the grocery store when one of my girls is pitching a fit or the baby is wailing his guts out. The commenter get this simpering smile, nods a little, tsk-s, and says, "You know, someday you'll miss this. You'll look back on all this and just laugh at how wonderful it was!" I generally try to smile back and say, "I know. I really am lucky aren't I!"

I wonder, though, how much of this will I really look back on and laugh about? The tantrums in the grocery stores could be funny if told in the right manner and at a prime occassion (first dates? wedding receptions?). I think I'll hold onto to all stories involving poop and vomit for when my kids' kids are flinging bodily fluids madly about their houses. But, then, schadenfreude--while pleasant--isn't the same as having a good belly laugh. I know I won't look back on the sleepless nights and the angry outbursts with glee.

I think this is true for other things in life too. It's not just with kids, but when we are faced with anything hard we want to tell ourselves that we'll look back on this sometime and laugh. That someday, somewhere (anyone singing West Side Story yet?) we'll feel better about all the tough things in our lives. But will we really?

Maybe in an effort to look back on all my depressed days and laugh, I've been scouring the Internet for jokes about depression. Turns out there aren't any. Well, at least not any good ones. Read on, if you dare!, because I am about to post some really UN-funny jokes. (I got them from this website.)

Q. What's good about depression?
A. You always have your funeral planned in advance,

Q. What's good about being depressed?
A. Nothing. But it's no worse than anything else since life sucks anyhow.

Q. What's good about Treatment Resistent Depression?
A. You qualify for all the Clinical Trials!

Q. What's an advantage to Major Depression?
A. You never have to make your bed, since you're always in it.

And a final note from Woody Allen: "On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down."

If you guys know any good jokes be sure to post them here. We could all use the laugh!